Step 1: Decide on a Saturday afternoon at 3 PM that you should definitely go on a family bike ride through some tulip fields, because after all, you live in Holland now, and there's bound to be some tulip fields around somewhere. Right?
Step 2: Spend 3 minutes consulting Mr. Google, read some random blog with vague details about a super fantastic bike ride someone went on once. It's just that easy to spend as little time possible preparing!
Step 4.5: Try your absolute best to get separated in the crowds and winding, medieval streets. I cannot stress enough how essential this is. Because trying to navigate through masses of people on a bike while talking on a cell phone in a place you don't know in order to find your spouse who doesn't know where they are or how to get you there is a total blast. It's just like playing Where's Waldo in real life, except with less stripes and more marital discord. Are we having fun yet?!
Step 5: Remember the charming city part in Step 3? Well, when you finally find each other, get through the crowds and find yourself on the outskirts of this adorable place, do not allow your children to be happy about the quaint and picturesque surroundings. Make sure they are whining, and cold. Check to see if you brought extra warm clothes for them. No? Good thinking. That will increase their unhappiness by at least 6 fold, which is really the minimum level for an adventure like this.
Step 7: Hungry? Well, you will be if you ate all the snacks on the train, and you've been biking for over an hour. Good job.
Step 8: Decide to turn around before you reach any actual tulip fields, because it's been 3 hours since you left the house and it's going to get dark soon and no one has had dinner and everyone is freezing. If you actually reach your destination, you have failed. *Hot tip: beg your kids to ask you "when are we going home?" every 2 minutes.
Optional step: When you arrive home, go to your favorite closest Japanese noodle bar, and congratulate yourself on another successful family adventure. If that sounds too idyllic, I have two words for you: chopstick swords.