Aug 20, 2008

Costco: the game!

Are you ready to play?

We start off with "Spot the Mormons." It's easy during the summer. Just look for knee length shorts and cap sleeve shirts, a minimum of 3 kids hanging off the cart, and a cart full of diet coke. It's fun and wholesome!

Next we move on to "Shopping Cart Traffic Jam", thanks to Elderly Couple Stopped in the Middle of the Aisle, and Bottleneck at the Free Samples.

Speaking of the samples, it's time for "Demo Derby": how many times can you hit each one without getting caught? Careful, those old ladies can be feisty!

Oh no! It's the dreaded "Toddler Tantrum/5 Year Old has to go Potty Right Now!" obstacle. Remember to smile, you're on camera.

You made it to the check-out line! Let's play "Pimp my Total!" Will it be $135? $189? No, it's $270, and half of that is for diapers. Hurray for almost 3 year-olds who aren't potty trained!

Make sure to treat yourself to a Costco Dog on your way out: 5000 calories in 10 bites-- you deserve it!

But wait, the fun doesn't end there! When you get home you get to play "Where am I going to put all this crap?" (also known as "Time to Buy a Deep Freezer").

Thanks for playing-- Hope you won!


Courtney said...

I won!!! My almost FOUR year old and still wearing diapers pushed my points above yours! Ha ha!

John said...

My favorite is "Most Expensive Impulse Buy". "Giant inflatable castle? Sure, I need that."

Sara said...

I think I get extra points for the "kids in the double cart smacking each other (while screaming loudly) because they can't stand to sit that close to each other for another second" obstacle.


I think I have been to Costco twice in the 9 years Suzy and I have been married.

This fact brings up an interesting question...

Can one fact simultaneously be the reason person A loves person B and person B hates person A?

The silver lining to Costco is it sometimes forces you to realize you don't need some things. When I see that I get to pay $17 dollars for the pleasure of ingesting that vat of mayonnaise over the next 4 years of my life, its easy to eliminate mayonnaise from my diet.

Gabriela Hull said...

My favorite Costco moment happened the instant I thought in my mind, "I'm so glad my 2 and 4 year old behave so well." We were at the checkout line and they started screaming and crying and hitting each other. They had never done that.

But the fun didn't stop there. As I was walking to my car, the paper plates that I had bought for the ward activity started to slip out of the bag and spilled onto the street. A very nice lady stopped and picked up the plates while I tried to stop the boys from hitting each other. She even took the plates to the store and asked a worker to exchange them for me.

L and T said...

My favorite Costco game is...(fyi, I fill in at the pharmacy sometimes)
Trying to explain to the retired men, many of whom are temple workers, why their executive Costco membership doesn't entitle them to unauthorized refills of Viagra. I win every time. It makes me feel as ginormous as the big box warehouse itself.
Also, we are very glad to see the way cool Bardsley blog

Neva said...

You have just illustrated my love/hate relationship with Costco. Yes, I love Costco because it makes it possible for me to get cheap gas and buy saran wrap and garbage bags every two years. Yes, I hate Costco because I can't seem to stay within my budget because I keep getting sucked in by large amounts of ______ (fill in the blank). My favorite game is called "trying really hard NOT to buy the frozen yogurt from the food court" and if I do lose, "trying really hard to get said frozen yogurt out to the car before one of my kids smacks it out of my hand." I lose at both regularly.